My personal statement 15/3/11
Where to begin?!
Why am I trying to paint ? it is something I just want to do BUT I do not want to be a bad painter - what is bad painting?
Why not go to uni? No time and I just want to PAINT . OK I understand that I need to know more than just paint application BUT how much more? . I am doing this for me and if other people like some of it – great!
What do I want to paint with ? Well in my heart I think I will eventually concentrate on pastels BUT not yet – too early – too much to learn and too much to try! Pastels are impactful , immediate and just plain lush.
What excites me ? COLOUR – but it might be bright like Vincent Van Gogh or subtle like Georgio Morandi or somewhere in the middle like Fred Cuming or Winslow Homer.
Going well going badly ? This is the strange thing about painting – the more I paint the more I realise how subtle the shift is between like and dislike, finished and not overworked, dreadful moving to great in a handful of strokes. Sometimes the 5 minute experiment is so much ‘more’ than the weeks long epic!
And my taste in art . is shifting. When I started painting I realised my influences came from those that had input to my learning – Kurt Jackson and Sheila Trevena come to mind . Going to exhibitions expands that repertoire – trouble is I spend a part of my time thinking how I want to be back behind a brush trying it out for myself .
Assighment 2 of FYW has caused me strife . Choose a painting to analyse - well that’s easy – well I thought it was still I started trying. In the end I have had to choose the painting that has moved me most – trouble is I have an illegal photo of it BUT I do not know who painted it ! It was in the Vatican so probably not a back street artist! It is sitting between a Bacon and a Dali!
AND then I have to paint in the style of …..all very well but I want to try Winslow Homer, Klimt, Andrew Wyeth, Paul Klee, Georgio Morandi , and more ! But again I had to think what has touched me the most in terms of ‘if only I could ….describe a landscape in that way……..and then the light bulb moment Alan Cotton – of course – the £5 book I bought at a motorway service station ! That book has been opened as many timers as the History of Art…. no…. more! So, I hear my tutor saying, think again .No I say , it is what I like that counts in my head. I promise to try and widen my tastes BUT in the meanwhile I know what I like today! Cannot say as yet about tomorrow. By the way I read a biography of Francis Bacon because I know I need to work on understanding his paintings at least little. Well I read it cover to cover and it was a struggle. I now understand that, for him, his art is about provoking negative reaction – he does not want comfortable.
I am impatient. I have left it rather late to start and cannot waste time now with peripheral vision. No I must be focussed.
Then of course there is the ‘en plein aire’ painting that pulls me out when the temperatures are bearable! I love my oil pochades – somehow there is the gut feeling that I am doing something honest with the paint . But then I get too comfortable and maybe I need to change the colours I carry – comfort zones not good!
Is the best work done when you are new to the next ‘out of comfort zone’ experience? Or is it just that is something new seems so much better one becomes more critical of what I do WITHIN ones comfort zone?
This ART malarkey is not a straightforward affair!
3/4/11
Yet another internal battle – Alan Cotton uses TUBES of paint per painting and, even if I can afford that , how long for it to dry? 2nd plan of action Moira Huntly - I love her work and I love the idea that you go somewhere, you do detailed sketches and then you produce a painting that is not a slavish copy of this roof and that chimney but rather ‘the essence of” . Mind you , having done a reasonably detailed sketch of the coastline at Lyme Regis the other day I would have to somehow incorporate sand flies who have bitten me rotten!
I have a real dilemma reach time I go out – take the oil pochade , take my sketching gear, take my pastels, - NO I cannot take it all as I end up going round in circles. I need to find a way of travelling light and getting something done without needing a transit van and Sherpa. Is it my lack of confidence that makes me feel I need so much gear? Is it that I really do enjoy swapping from one thing to another making life difficult for myself but feeling eventually it will all be worthwhile? The latter I think.
Anyway ‘art and the OCA’ have prompted me to start a blog and today I analysed a painting – finally – I have spent at least 3 weeks just mulling it over! I actually find using a blog a great way to pull together all the loose ends of material and thought that I have. It is neat and appeals to my sense of order without being difficult to come to terms with.
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